- FLASH FLOOD WARNING FOR PITTSBURGH AND SURROUNDING AREAS! There are warnings in place for inhabitants of this city to evacuate because of the flood waters. Scientists have found the probable cause: Steelers Fans crying after the Ravens beat the Steelers on Saturday, January 15, 2011. Expect the waters to wash in around 7-8 o' clock.
- Michael Vick, Ray Lewis, and Ben Rothlisburger are trekking up Mount Everest, arguing who likes their own team more. Vick was first. "This is for the Eagles!" he cries, throwing himself off the mountain. Ray then declares, "This is for everyone!" and pitches Ben Rothlisburger off the mountain.
- On the first day of school, a second grade teacher tells her new class she is a Steelers fan. She then asks if anyone else is a Steelers fan. Everyone raises their hands except for one little girl. "Honey, who do you like then?" asks the teacher. "The Ravens because my mommy and daddy like them," says the girl. "What if your dad is a moron and your mom is an idiot?" the teacher said. The girl thought a moment, then replied, "Then I'd be a Steelers fan."
- On the first day of school, a second grade teacher tells her new class she is a Steelers fan. The kids run screaming out of the classroom.
P.S. I don't like the Steelers.
P.P.S. At all.